Spending 24 hours in tokyo. I want to experience the weirdest things and buy the weirdest souvenirs. No boundaries. Sex food or anything else.
Traveling with the opposite sex? Yes or no?
So I dont have any friends and there is a girl at work who i get a long with very well and is the only person i really have a social life with.. Basically she is the closest thing I have to a friend and I feel as though she is in a similar position of having few to no friends too.
We often talk about travel and places we would like to go and she has done some traveling herself
Is it a bad idea to travel with her overseas platonically? Oh I also thing she has a thing for me too.
Bad idea that could just end up being a very long and bad, expensive date?
Should I like something? Yes or no?
It depends on if you like it or not. I travel frequently with my wife, mother and daughter, and enjoy the trip. With female co-workers, it depends on if she is a fun person to travel with or not.
I'm in the similar position as you op and damn I wish I can set up something with this girl at my workplace.
You're not paying her ticket so why not?
If she has a thing for you, it would be wiser to test the waters with that and see where it leads before you make and plans for travel. As for travelling with the opposite sex, it can be good if you both enjoy similar things, and are clear about what type of relationship exists between you.
Example: I have had some great weekend getaways with my girlfriend, but when we went backpacking together neither of us enjoyed it much because our ability to handle stress/ uncertainty is quite different. Likewise one time when I was travelling solo I met a girl and we ended up travelling 'platonically' for some time as a way of saving money. It worked well because she'd made it clear she had a boyfriend, wasn't demanding of my attention and didn't give off flirty vibes. Probably helped that I'd recently and didn't find her attractive.
Basically what I'm saying in your situation it's a very bad idea. If you end up in a relationship with her at home, go ahead and travel. If you two end up as just friends (i.e. you don't find her attactive), then you could go.
I'd travel with you.
I was in the same position as you, and went on a trip. it was great. but there was nothing between us.
I say you should resolve that part before planning any trip first
If you want to have her, go with her (don't pay for her), and maybe you'll get laid. If you want to have other women on your trip, do not go with her.
So much this. I went on a trip with a girl that is my friend, probably deep down because i wanted to have her. The friend zone was too strong, and I never did. She also made a terrible wingman and scared girls away from me bc they thought she was with me. I also had to take care of literally all the planning and had to always be the one making sure no body with us. She managed to get scammed anyway at least once.
I've also traveled alone and going with her was infinitely better than that. But yeah don't pay for her.
However if you two really are the only people either of you have, maybe you'll have the entire trip and then get married. Or if she's hot she might get swooped.
Ranking of options:
Find bro friends and go with them
Find internet bro acquaintances and go with them
Go with this chick and have sex
Go with this chick and don't have sex
One last thing where you go is a factor too
Why is going alone so bad? I've traveled alone and loved it.
I guess a lot of people do it and enjoy it, but I personally had a miserable experience by myself. Sure I would meet people at the hostel and sometimes they would be cool, you have to do it over and over again at each place and it got old for me fast without another true ally that I knew I would go home with or at least see again. I really like sharing traveling experiences with my real friends, growing and bonding together, I can't imagine me ever enjoying anything as much alone. When you go alone you might at best find 1 or 2 cool people to tag along with, but at worst you won't find anyone cool and will be miserable alone
I spent 2 weeks travelling in Europe with two of my closest friends, the first week was awesome but by the end of the second week I wanted to punch them both in the face. Spending an average of 12 hours a day (excluding sleep) with them was way too much.
The endless decision making and compromises became too much at one point.
We were close enough that we could laugh about it a few days after we got back, but it was pushing the limits.
Also sight-seeing by yourself and eating by yourself are seriously the most depressing things I can think of
What if you sign up for a group trip how would those be, you go alone, but meet people in the same group or whatever
Most people in a group are with others themselves, so -assuming- the same reason you don't have any friends to travel with will apply to meeting people in a group.
I personally never understand how people in group travel, who don't know eachother, "meet". Like do you just randomly talk about how your day is going? That just seems awkward. Or "how are you liking x".
You will not be able to go over seas with a girl, especially if you think she has a thing for you. If she says yes she'll expect to either be treated like on a date, or to bone. (probably both)
Don't do it unless you want to be in a serious relationship.
True, planning on going to Thailand next year with fnez so maybe i can get a buddy to go with me. Many of my freinds are alcoholics though...there is a girl who i could get to im almost positive but not sure as i'd probably damn her and not sure if shed want a relationship etc etc
though i will admit sightseeing with somebody else is more rewarding. eating isn't an issue though, you just don't go to nice restaurants. it's also a cultural thing too, in Japan it's completely normal to eat alone, but in China you don't eat at a restaurant unless you have a huge group of people.
You're a needy piece of stuff.
I personally had a miserable experience by myself.
Use lotion next time.
why does wanting to be with my favorite people while having life changing experiences make me a piece of stuff? being with your real friends is always better how is this even an argument
Not the guy you're replying to, and I wouldn't call you a piece of stuff for enjoying company, but personally having even your best friend around when sight-seeing or doing similar activities is the most obnoxious thing ever. Unless your interests match 100% you always feel like you're either dragging him or vice versa, also I hate hearing comments while I'm admiring something, but I can't go "shut up" on my friend, can I? It's not even a question of having loquacious or taciturn friends, because someone will always try to talk at some point as it gets awkward, ruining the immersion completely for me.
So no, being with your friends is not always better for everyone.
I do admit I enjoy eating with other people more than I do alone, though, but I'd rather eat alone if I can then enjoy the rest of the trip without nuisance too.
I can't go "shut up" on my friend, can I?
I'm sorry to be the one to tell you that but if you cannot do it, is not your friend.
I went erasmus with my best friend for one year and the first we decided was to live separately to have double of parties and doesn't have to hang with hte other if one is not in the mood.
This same friend prefer to go ladies in Thailand as go party, so we met later.
Of course we "go norself" eachother each time is necessary and nothing happens, they're your friends but that doesn't man that you have to do 24/7 stuff with them even if you're travelling together.
It's an argument because different people like different things.
It was a stupid rude post because it was likely a troll. You fed him. Good job.
Go with her
Don't pay for her
Act as if she's a male friend
If it turns to something else then so be it, but still don't pay for stuff - easy.
No tweets about this topic yet. Tweet us at @trvlthoughts to contribute!
This topic has not been tagged yet.
This topic has been viewed 1643 times and has 23 replies.